30 ways of behaving like a tourist

You can recognize a tourist from almost hundreds of meters away. But how is this possible? Is it the behavior of a tourist? The clothes? Is it even getting worse when they open their mouth? And even more important: Am I one of them? Here is a list of things that show that you are a typical tourist.

Tourist girls jumping in the air for a picture

1. When using the escalator, you always stand on the wrong side.

2. You think landing a plane deserves a round of applause.

3. You stare at the locals on the streets, as if they were animals in the zoo.

4. You are stared at by locals, as if you were an animal in the zoo.

A typical tourist with a bad style of cloths

5. You think everything that is “Lonely Planet recommended” would be a hot insider tip.

6. You imitate the accent of the locals and think you do that really well.

7. You take a photo with your friends, where you all jump at the same time and think it is sooo funny.

8. You need so much time to handle the subway ticket machine that there is a long queue behind you.

9. You buy postcard books about the city from street vendors and are firmly convinced that they are totally high quality.

10. You think to go shopping on the weekend would be such a good idea, that no one else would have it. Neither a tourist nor a local.

A street vendor selling handbags to a tourist

11. You buy a Louis Vuitton bag for 150 euro on the street and think you just made a great deal.

Three tourist taking photos of something important

12. You take photos of every old building that looks kind of important.

A tourist taking a selfie on top of a skyscraper in New York

13. You take a photo of yourself in front of every old building that looks kind of important or your ask someone to take a photo of you.

14. You ask someone to take a photo of you with local police officers, firefighters or security guards.

Tourist making a photo together with some security guards

15. You wear an all weather Gore-Tex jacket.

16. You wear trekking shoes, because hey, as a tourist you have to walk around all day, right?

17. You follow a guy through the city that waves a small flag and keeps on talking in a bad accent all the time.

A typical Hop-on hop-off tourist bus in Kuala Lumpur

18. You sit in a hop-on-hop-off-bus and are annoyed about the fact, that you understand the voice of the guy from the speakers so badly.

19. It takes you hours, to find a bank that still accepts traveler’s cheques.

20. You have a strap around your neck saying Nikon or Canon in big letters.

A Chinese Tourist taking a photo of his wife

21. You wear a Hard Rock Cafe bag.

22. You turn your head upside down when on the subway in order to read the subway map on the ceiling.

23. You sit in outdoor cafes in immediate proximity to the most important sights and still wonder about the high prices.

24. You think if there are many other tourists dining in a restaurant, it would be a sign that the place offers particularly good “local” food.

25. You give way too less tip.

26. You give way too much tip.

Loads of tourist queueing up in front of the Louvre museum in Paris

27. You waste hours waiting in front of sights to visit them and pay exorbitant prices because after all, you’re only there once.

28. You let artists on the piazza draw an amazingly funny portrait of you.

Portrait painters waiting for a tourist to pay them in Rome

29. You wait in front of the closed doors of your hotel restaurant to be the first to get inside.

30. You bitch about other tourists and how strange they behave.

Are you a typical tourist? Did you recognize yourself in one or another tourist fact? C’mon, let me know and leave a comment!

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  1. Reiseblog says:

    Wie wahr, wie wahr! Tolle Zusammenstellung, die zum Schmunzeln anregt.

  2. Flo says:

    Großartig geschrieben & bebildert, Kompliment! Bei ein paar Punkten habe ich mich auch selbst ertappt und musste schmunzeln 😉

    Lieben Gruß,

    • Clemens says:

      Hi Flo, danke! Ich glaub ich hab mich beim Schreiben des Artikels sogar selbst ertappt…

  3. Number 9 happened to me once…

  4. Karin says:

    Haha, wie geil! Musste sehr lachen. Bitte mehr davon!

  5. Christina says:

    Toll! Ich habe mich wiedererkannt. Wobei: Fast schlimmer finde ich die ausdrückliche Betonung eines Reisenden, dass er da ja total “off-the-beaten-path” war und unter “locals”. Die Mischung machts. Lg, Christina

  6. Funny .. I’ve been some of these too

  7. Stefan says:

    Haha this is so true. I’m guilty of number 8 in the Paris metro.. Hopefully not too many others. Great post! 🙂

  8. fotoeins says:

    I’ve done them all, collected the scars. Stolz drauf. Sorta. Mostly. Yeahhhh ….


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